Tuesday, February 24, 2009

It seems an Anonymous writer from boosh magazine has some choice words about comcast!

Here is a letter from an anonymous writer from boosh magazine, you can check out the link at;


Dear Comcast,

I’d like to start off by telling you how much I hate you. I don’t mean that in a way where I’m just mad right now so I am saying something that I don’t really feel. Truly, surely and undoubtedly, I wish your existence a slow and painful death followed by an afterlife bursting with sorrow, shame and extreme embarrassment. You suck sweaty balls.

You may be taken aback by an introductory paragraph as strong as the one above. If so, then get ready baby, because we haven’t even scratched the surface.

For the past three months I have had a major league bone to pick with you and your Sally-ass corporate policy concerning business accounts. I’ve had it with you, and now we're going to throw down. You and your unresponsive and unaccountable army of “customer service” representatives have pushed me to the limits of my patience. It’s time for you to pay.

Just to refresh your greedy memory, all of my troubles with you started in October of 2008 when I contacted your business clients services department with the intent of canceling my TV service and two of the four phone lines that I had going into my office. I was paying something like $300.00 per month for TV, internet and cable, and by canceling two phone lines and the TV service, I’d have been saving almost $200 per month! As you know, you money-grubbing whore of a corporation, that kind of savings can really add up for a business during tough economic times. The representative I initially contacted for the cancellation, her name was Guadalupe I think, said that the cancel order would be processed and that my new bill would be $100 per month. I hung up the phone with a feeling of relief.

You can imagine my level of confusion when I received my next month’s bill, which stated a fee of $300 be paid for television, four phone lines and internet. I figured that surely there must have been some type of misunderstanding. I again called your business clients service department with the intent of clearing up the mix up. It was then that the fun began. Another one of your reps took a look at my account and informed me that no cancellation request had been processed and that because I have a business account, I’d need to type out formal letter containing my account number and written consent to terminate the phone lines and the TV service. I informed him that this was the first I had heard about writing a letter. The rep insisted that this was “company policy”. I hung up, wrote the goddamn letter, and faxed it to the given number so that my cancellation could be processed.

A week went by and I didn’t hear a peep from anyone at Comcast. I called in again, this time, slightly more agitated. I talked with yet another one of your reps, and he went ahead and pulled up my info. As if I were talking to a broken record, he informed me that there was no cancellation request processed on my account, and that in order to cancel business services, I’d need to write out a formal letter. I told him about the first letter that I sent in, and he said that there was nothing on file. I then asked to speak with the department manager, secretly knowing that he was probably as big of a dip shit loser as the rest of your reps. After a long talk with him about my account, he agreed to waive the letter and process the request himself. I said thanks, hung up the phone and let out a sigh of relief.

Another week went by, and sure enough my Comcast bill arrived. Do you want to know how much it was for? I’ll bet you already know, you evil bastard. Yep, you guessed it. For services including four phone lines, TV and internet service, I was to pay $300.

I called in again and really gave it to yet another of your asshole reps. He was quick to say that it wasn’t his fault and that I should not be so rude. Do you want to guess what else he told me? He said that a cancellation request was in processing, but in order to have it completed, I’d need to fax in a formal letter expressing my intent to cancel services.

At this point I was fed up. I told him to modify the request to include cancellation of all my services. I was wiping my hands of you guys. I figured I’d go over to AT&T. Not only are they cheeper, but I hear their high speed internet isn’t a turd, unlike yours.

I’ll fast forward to the present, which is a month after my request to cancel all my services. So far nothing has happened. I’ve called multiple times to follow up on the progress, but apparently none has been made. And just yesterday I received another bill for $300 that included a note telling me I owed $300 for last month’s service.

Guess what Comcast? Now it’s my turn to fuck with you. I kept records of every conversation that I have had with your reps in regards to canceling my service. Not only do I have written records, but I also have recordings of your reps telling me conflicting policy statements. Even though this may not be criminal, is this info of interest to investigative reporters? Oh yes.

This past Friday I sent a copy of all my stuff to Tom Martino “The Troubleshooter” show here in Denver, CO. If you aren’t familiar with Tom Martino, allow me to introduce him. He is a journalist that specializes in calling out businesses on their bullshit tactics. He's pretty much the pr angel of death. And guess what Comcast? Today the show’s producer called me and said they will be doing a feature on my story. Isn't that great news? Something about how mega corporations are exploiting small business like myself, which as we all know, are the backbone of this nation’s economy. You see, I may just be a little shop owner, but I have a big voice. My story is one of the average hardworking Joe trying for his own version of the American Dream. You have been taking advantage of me, and now you will be exposed for the predator that you are. People are going to eat it up. Get ready to take it in the pants Comcast!

And when you have a chance, I’d still like to have my all service canceled.



  1. Reading your post was a wonderful Mothers Day present to myself. Comcast sucks and you put it so eloquently. Bless you.

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